Friday's Absurdity: AOC Flees NYC COVID Outbreak, Finds Safety in the Oddest Place

So, consider this: Say you’re the scare-mongering, radical leftist member of congress from the New York City borough of Queens, and your city is currently setting new records for “infections” from COVID-19. Your political party, led by its Mengele-channeling mouthpiece Anthony Fauci, has succeeded in putting your constituents into an absolute panic over this new “variant” that looks suspiciously like a common cold. They’re all rushing out double and triple-masked onto the streets, flooding to any drug store, grocery store, hospital or minor emergency center that provides “tests”, clogging up the city’s streets and sidewalks as they stupidly overwhelm every heath facility in the area, waiting on-line for hours to see if they’re “sick” even though 98% of them have no symptoms whatsoever.

If you’re the scare-mongering, radical leftist member of congress from Queens, wouldn’t you consider this a prime opportunity to go home, get in the middle of it, and at least act like you’re trying to be helpful? Wouldn’t this be the best time in your entire career to show you actually care about something other than destroying the country? I mean, isn’t the whole political point of working so hard to create this panic so you can then rush in and prove your people need you to make it all better?

Sure, it is. And you would want to rush back home and save the day because you want to not only get re-elected to your seat in 2022, you have higher ambitions. You have long made it clear that you plan to challenge Chuck Schumer for his senate seat when he runs for re-election in 2024. Your name has begun appearing on lists of likely Democrat nominees for the presidency in 2028 and 2032. You like the look and sound of that - what better way to destroy America, after all, than to do it from the Oval Office? You know, like Joe Biden has been doing for the last year.

That all makes sense, doesn’t it? Isn’t that what any rational person with functioning cranial synapses would do? Sure it is.

But AOC is not a rational person. Her cranial synapses function, but only in the most purely demented ways. Thus, she did not go home to Queens to try to at least pretend to be useful this week. She was not found back in the borough helping her voters contend with an illness most will never contract and 90% of whom who do will never even feel. She chose not to go home, because home is not a pleasant place right now thanks to her efforts and efforts by Fauci and Biden and Harris, et al.

Plus, Queens isn’t safe right now. It’s a Democrat-run city after all, and in addition to the current completely artificial COVID panic, it has a rapidly rising rate of violent crime, including rape and murder - you know, things that could nip AOC’s future political ambitions in the bud.

AOC needed to go someplace safe instead. She no doubt surveyed the country, searching in vane for some blue state to occupy for awhile, but obviously could find none that were safe. Because, hey, the blue states are all run by Democrats, after all, and making things safe is not a goal of the Democrat Party. Perish the very thought. Why, that would serve no political purpose at all. Even Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema understand that.

So, where did AOC decide to go? What safe place did she decide to grace with her evil, sulphurous presence for a quick vacay?

Why, Miami Beach, silly. Of course she went to the safe, free state of Florida. After all, she was looking for some fun in the sun, a little sidewalk tequila, rum punches on the beach, some really rad night life, all without having to show proof of vaccinations or wear those silly, useless masks.

Florida. The free, Red state of Florida. That’s where the member of congress from Queens was photographed Thursday. Right there in Ron DeSantis land, sitting at a table with some random pasty-faced white guy sipping some Cuban margaritas at a Miami Beach bar while her constituents panic for their lives.

Because of course she was. Her main other option, after all, was Texas, and Florida has better beaches.

If Democrats did not already exist, nobody could ever possibly make them up. And seriously, why would anyone want to try?

That is all.

P.S.: #AOCLovesDeSantis is trending now on Twitter. Hilarious.