Friday's Fabulous Absurdities: Old Joe Proves There's an App for Everything

Before we get into the absurdities this morning, there is actually some good news to report: Buffalo Bills Safety Damar Hamlin’s condition has improved dramatically over the last couple of days, and his doctors said yesterday he appears to be “cognitively intact.” Which could mean Hamlin has suffered no brain damage after his heart was stopped for several minutes after a violent hit on the field Monday night.

Hamlin was in fact communicating with his family and doctors on Thursday with a chalkboard - he remains intubated and unable to speak - and even asked upon waking up which team won the game.

Another bit of really good news was the outpouring of goodwill from fellow players and fans all over the country who made contributions to a GoFundMe Hamlin had set up for a charity, the Chasing M Foundation, which organizes toy drives for kids. Hamlin had set a goal of raising $2,500 for Chasing M last fall. As of yesterday, his fellow Americans had driven that number up to a somewhat amazing total of $7.4 million.

God Bless America.